


I Know I'm Hurting Deep Down (But Can't Show It)

by ghostlygone



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Crazy, Demons, Dialogue Heavy, Gen, I Don't Even Know, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I don't know if this makes sense, I'm Sorry, Inner Dialogue, Internal Conflict, Weird Lay Out, but oh well, really weird
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:46:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22285834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostlygone/pseuds/ghostlygone
Summary: Clary knows that something is wrong, she just doesn't know what.Basically loads of dialogue accompanied by some inner dialogue.Might make this into an actual fic when I finish my other ones.
Relationships: Clary Fray & Simon Lewis & Alec Lightwood & Isabelle Lightwood & Jace Wayland





	I Know I'm Hurting Deep Down (But Can't Show It)

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't remember posting this at all, so I'm apologising now. I'm so sorry, I don't know what this is
> 
> Title from 1-800-273-8255 by Logic

"How are you?"

"I'm fine Iz, you don't need to worry."  
(I can feel it growing stronger, it's coming back)  
(You need to worry)

"Are you sure?"

"Yes Iz, now go see Simon!"  
(No, it's coming for me and I won't be able to fight it)  
(I'm too weak)

"You look better."

"Thanks...?"  
(I don't think I can fight it like this)  
(Not after last month)

"How's it feeling?"

"Great, Magnus! You did an amazing job on fixing it."  
(Horrible, it's a chink in my armour)  
(It's where they came in)

"How are you Clary? Simon told us what happened."

"I'm doing fine mom. Really, I was walking around this morning."  
(It's getting worse, I can feel it)  
(It's eating me from the inside out)

"Good to see you out of your room, kiddo."

"Hey! You know I wanted to come down!"  
(I've been planning, planning on how to defeat them)  
(I can't find anything)

"Let me know if there is anything I can do for you, ok?"

"Of course."  
(I need you to kill them, to kill me)  
(I can't tell you though)

"I'm here for you, okay?"

"I know."  
(No you're not, otherwise you would have killed them by now)  
(Would have killed me)

"You're my Parabatai, Fray. I've got your back."

"And I've got yours, Lewis."  
(You didn't have my back when they came)  
(When they knocked and asked to come in and I said yes)

"We should have a girls night! Just us two, obviously"

"Yeah."  
(They're here. They're getting closer)  
(Closer to their goal)

"We need to upgrade your wardrobe, biscuit! Look at this shirt, honestly!"

"Yeah, honestly."  
(They're taking control)  
(I can't stop them)

"We miss you at the Institute, you know."

"Yeah"  
(I'm too weak to take them by myself)  
(I can't involve you guys)

"Hey Kiddo, I brought you some food"

"Thanks"  
(I can see them, they're standing next to you)  
(Why can't you see them)

"Hello Sweetie. How are you feeling?"

"Fine"  
(They're coming at me, they're surrounding me)  
(Why aren't they coming for you)

"Hi! Is that a new painting?"

"Yeah"  
(It's been there for years, but I can't see it anymore)  
(They're blocking it)

"You know, you should come round one day, just for a couple of minutes."

"Maybe"  
(I can't leave)  
(If I leave, they will kill you all)

"How are you?"

"Who are you?"  
(I recognise you, I remember you hated me)  
(But who are you, they won't let me remember)

"Hey Sweetie"

"Go away! I don't know you! Just...please, just go."  
(I want them to leave me alone, I want to remember)  
(I want to know who these people are)

"Please...please....just leave, just go"  
(They're still there, they're still here)  
(They're not moving)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really sorry.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed? Maybe?


End file.
